1.
Don't
pee
in
the
pool,
it's
against
the
law.
】
2.
Lawyers
are
the
only
ones
who
think
a
loophole
is
a
good
thing.
】
3.
The
only
time
a
lawyer's
case
is
water
tight
is
when
it
leaks.
】
4.
A
good
lawyer
knows
the
law,
a
great
lawyer
knows
the
judge.
】
5.
It's
not
the
mistake
that
counts,
it's
who
made
it.
】
6.
The
only
time
truth
prevails
in
court
is
in
a
movie.
】
7.
If
at
first
you
don't
succeed,
sue
again.
】
8.
The
only
thing
worse
than
losing
a
lawsuit
is
winning
one.
】
9.
The
only
way
to
get
a
lawyer
to
remember
your
name
is
to
owe
them
money.
】
10.
A
courtroom
is
the
only
place
where
a
person
can
get
a
life
sentence
and
not
be
in
prison.
】
11.
The
shortest
sentence
you
can
say
in
court
is
"I
do".
】
12.
It's
not
what
you
know,
it's
what
you
can
prove.
】
13.
The
one
who
represents
themselves
in
court
has
a
fool
for
a
client
and
a
lawyer
for
an
opponent.
】
14.
The
most
powerful
person
in
the
courtroom
is
the
one
with
the
checkbook.
】
15.
The
law
is
a
maze,
the
judge
is
the
compass,
the
lawyer
is
the
compass
salesman.
】
16.
The
only
thing
more
expensive
than
a
good
lawyer
is
a
bad
one.
】
17.
The
difference
between
a
contract
and
a
friend
is
that
you
can
always
sue
a
contract.
】
18.
Hearsay
is
like
a
game
of
telephone,
the
more
it's
passed
around,
the
less
accurate
it
becomes.
】
19.
A
subpoena
is
just
a
fancy
way
of
saying,
"you
better
show
up".
】
20.
You
may
not
be
able
to
buy
happiness,
but
you
can
always
buy
a
good
lawyer.
】